Jana Pittman

My mouth is filled with a fine white powder while I'm writing this. No i havent found a new way of imbibing cocaine, it is actually my teeth that have been ground down to stumps. That is the intensity with which i detest Jana Pittman.
She has always been lauded as this great, courageous and misunderstood Aussie. All she can do is bloody run fast. And not even fast enough.
I know you may start quoting the lovely phrase 'Tall poppy syndrome', but how can you bring someone down when they werent up there anyway.
Excuse me i need to go and rinse...

Bobby Flynn

Mucho Retardo
Indeedily doodily

Venus and Serena

I have nothing against the tennis skills of these sisters, but iam hugely offended by their inability to dress appropriately. I know they are from the west siide and i also know that they arent as far through the chain of evolution as the rest of us, but how hard is it to not always look like a crack whore. Obviously huge amounts of money cant buy them taste and tact, but it seems to be buying huge amounts of lycra minis and polyester boob tubes.
All i can say is 'girlfriend get your booty to a stylist before i kick you to the curb'